Embracing my Heritage

Cochlear implants are amazing in that they can bring sound to people who cannot hear, but it still requires a lot of work and effort for people to use them to their maximum potential. Sound is just part of the process. The newly implanted patient must then go through a rigorous process in order to understand the new sounds that they can hear and then apply what they have learned into a spoken language. It is not an easy thing to do. My mom, to make it easier for me, helped me focus on learning English alone.  English is such a difficult language to learn. She thought that by limiting the amount of American Sign Language (ASL) I used that I would work my way through the frustration of listening, rather then giving up and switching to ASL, which was easier for me because it is a visual language. She wanted me to learn English because that meant that I could communicate with and be able to speak with everyone that I wanted to at home or in the neighborhood. I would never have learned how to speak and hear as well as I do if it wasn't for my mom. She was the one that was always there when I wanted to give up in frustration, when I needed an extra push to keep working, and she was always the one that made me feel the proudest when I made a breakthrough.

But this meant that I never learned ASL as fully as most of my Deaf peers have. I believe that I have my current level of listening comprehension and speaking ability because of my unwavering attention to one language. It didn't matter to me as much when I was younger when I ran into other deaf kids who I couldn't communicate with in ASL. I did feel a little disconcerted because I was a deaf person who couldn't sign, but I knew it was because I was doing my best to learn another language. But now that I am older, I feel that being deaf defines me more and more every year. People who find out that I am deaf always ask if I know ASL, and when I tell that I don't, it usually creates this reaction. They seem to think its weird. That reaction makes me wish that I knew ASL.

Now I do know a little sign language, but I have decided that I am going to learn ASL in its entirety. I am now comfortable enough with English, and even through I still learn new words and pronunciations everyday, I feel like I can dive completely into ASL and learn it. I want to be able to talk with everyone, regardless of whether they are hearing or deaf. I want to be the one who straddles both cultures. Just like how blogging combines all the cultures and societies across the nation, and allows for a new level of understanding between them.

First Thoughts on College

When I was first deciding which colleges I wanted to apply to, my mom and I had a few ideas in common about what kind of college we were looking for. We both were looking for smaller, liberal art colleges, where the classes would be smaller, and where I could have plenty of outside resources to help me if I struggled with the transition from high school to college. I have now been at Skidmore College for a month now, and I have to say I think I have found the perfect college for me. The student body is diverse in culture and background and all of the students are very friendly. Within the first week, I made so many friends. Looking back, I laugh at myself for being afraid that I would have a hard time making friends. The professors that I have in my classes, are both intelligent and clearly care about how the students do in class. The classes are small in size. The professors ask questions and lead discussions that every student in the class takes a part in. The campus is beautiful and right on the outskirts of Saratoga Springs, a great town with a lot of great shops and activities to do on the weekends.

There was one other very important reason that my Mom and I wanted a smaller school and eventually chose Skidmore. We were both worried that I might face difficulty in college because of my deafness. We both wanted to make sure that I would be in a school where I would have the least amount of trouble when it came to hearing, whether in the classroom or out, and where I could have help if I did struggle. Now that I am here, I can say that being deaf, and having cochlear implants, has not had a big impact on my college experience here at Skidmore College.

I came to Skidmore a little worried, but also curious about how having cochlear implants would play into my college life. I can now say with confidence. Nothing. I have been to all my first semester classes, and I have had no problem hearing and taking notes, as I follow the class and what other students have to say, and once in a while adding my own thoughts. I can hear the professor and the other students perfectly well, and I feel right at home in my classes. The Dining Hall, the only one on campus, is both loud and boisterous, but I have no trouble hearing and holding conversations with my friends in there, unlike a lot of restaurants that I have been to. Of course, college life would not be college life without the parties. I thought that parties would be some place where I would have trouble at college. Having attended a few parties, I feel like for the most part I can hear fine, and when I do have difficulty, its not so bad. Sometimes I do ask for friends to repeat themselves. Overall I am very happy with how it is going at Skidmore, I am having fun, and learning a lot from my classes.

Another really cool thing to point out is that I have noticed two other people at Skidmore who have cochlear implants, and a few others with hearing aids, one of my teachers being one. I don't feel that different from the other students, and while people are curious about deafness and cochlear implants, they don't treat you differently. I am glad to see that so many people are completely open to students with hearing loss and the idea of cochlear implants and hearing aids. Hopefully this attitude will be adopted by more people who are part of the Deaf Culture and those who take part in the cochlear implant controversy. The same thing goes for the English professors who have a bone to pick with blogging and internet text.

Let there be sound

I was born February 4, 1992 as the youngest of four, with two older sisters, and one older brother. My parents were experienced parents by the time I was born, and they knew the drill of raising a kid. But there was one thing that set me apart from my siblings as a child. I was born profoundly deaf, but the doctors did not check my hearing. So when I started worrying my parents with my unusual behavior, they brought me to the doctors to get me checked out. My parents first reactions were completely normal to the life changing news from the doctor that I was deaf, shock and anxiety thinking I could never have a semblance of a normal life and that I would never have a life of those of my peers and siblings. But my parents did not just throw-up their arms in defeat and acceptance after the initial shock, they immediately asked about what they could do to help me. One of the ideas that was discussed and finally chosen was cochlear implants, which would change the rest of my life.

Cochlear implants were a new technology that came out recently before I was born. It is a device that functions with an external device, and an internal device. The internal device, which is surgically implanted into the child, with a wire with a snail shaped coil of tiny electrodes at the end, called the "electrode array," is inserted in the inner ear. The electrodes with the proper codes from the external device, would stimulate the auditory nerve utilizing small bursts of electricity. The brain, amazingly enough, can use this electrical stimulation as sound. The external device, which has the microphones takes the sound in the area around the deaf person, and send it to the internal device via radio transmission held in place by magnets between the external and internal devices. These amazing devices are being treated with trepidation from certain communities. Not only from the Deaf Culture, fearing it as a genocidal technology, but parts of the hearing society who fear that implanting this device in children who are deaf takes away their choice in a very monumental decision that affects the rest of their lives and infringes on the rights of the Deaf Culture. It is a very controversial technology right now, with many debates on its usage. A comparison of this controversy can be compared to the idea of blogs. For right now blogs are in state of controversy as well, as part of the new wave of Internet writing that emphasis the actual content and speed instead of the traditional formal writing emphasis. Some people fear that blogs and other writing on the Internet are degrading the level of writing skills of the new generation who use it often. So just as the English departments around the world are trying to come in terms of the new style of writing and how it fits in with the traditional writing, people are trying to understand the cochlear implants role.

So I got my first cochlear implant at the age of two. It was a new process to implant kids at such a young age, and nobody could be sure of the results. But through a lot of hard work of the people around me, especially my parents, and a lot of time spent in speech therapy and listening exercises, I am able to participate in normal activities with no one being the wiser that I am deaf.

Gallaudet

Gallaudet is a famous college for the deaf in D.C., and recently there have been many debates and protests over the future of the college, because of the introduction of cochlear implants and changes in the education policies for deaf students, in the Washington Post there was an article that highlights some of the debates and what the college is doing,

http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/gallaudet-university-adjusts-to-a-culture-that-includes-more-hearing-students/2011/09/23/gIQAC3W9tK_story.html?wpisrc=emailtoafriend

What do you think about the changes, and would you do anything differently? Just some things to think about.

Old Poems

I attended a elementary school called CHS, or the Concord Hill School from kindergarten to third grade. One of the art classes that I took there had a project where we had to write a little poem and cut out a picture in the magazine that you liked, and combine the two. The result of my project, had a little picture of an eagle, with a small poem under it that went:

 Life and Death

Noise and Silence

 I am between

 Life and Death

Noise and Silence

Because I am Deaf

It is from this silly poem that I got the idea for my blog title, Life and Deaf. My mom put the poem on the fridge when I came home from CHS, and today it is still there on my fridge. So I have never forgotten my little poem.

The First Step

The idea of blogging never really caught my attention before, there were always other blogs to read, or books, or some other activity to do. But now I am taking an English class that requires students to create and keep a blog. At first I was a little wary at the idea of starting a blog, even if its for class, but over time as I thought about it, the idea of a starting a blog gets better and better. I have spent a lot of time talking with concerned parents of deaf children, or other deaf people about cochlear implants, deaf culture, how I did in school with cochlear implants in mainstream schools, and all other sorts of different questions regarding my self and deafness. So I thought why not use this blog as a chance to answer questions that people may have and and fulfill my class requirements, killing two birds with one stone.

Feel free to send me a email with any questions or thoughts that you may have to me at, mellonw@gmail.com